10 reasons why I hate FACETIME more than papercuts in my eyes

Following on from my other post, I’ve decided to summarise my hatred for Facetime on the iPhone.

1. The name is terrible ‘Fancy some Facetime?’ it sounds awkward and dirty. Get away from me. You might as well of called it ‘ArseFace’.
2. You can only use it over WiFi when every other phone in the world has it on 3G and WiFi.
3. Those stupid commercials where no one says anything.
4. That stupid commercial where the football team wins the cup and video calls their injured friend.
   Why? Because no Sunday league team has WiFi in their $%£&ing changing room and if they did I can’t imagine the players setting up their phone just to let their mate know they’d won.
5. Video calling has been around for SEVEN YEARS.
6. Because Apple pretends it’s new technology and advertises the s%$t out of it.
7. The other commercial that shows bad fathers playing away watching their kids do stuff for the first time on their iPhone while the mistress lathers up in the shower.
8. The way Apple make it out like it’s a new invention and that everyone will start doing it. It’s old and no-one’s bothered.
9. Having a camera on the front and back is, again, nothing new. If one more person tells me ‘It has a camera on the front AND the back’ I’m going to give them some FaceTime they’ll never forget.
10. And finally, did I mention that the name really sucks? Apple are normally really good with naming things (iPad, iPhone etc.) but what does FaceTime mean?? Does it mean it’s time for our faces?? Shoot me.